Draft (2019) – I am not ready
I am not ready.
Today when my child came home from school I turned off the TV and
The unending reports of scared children after yet another shooting.
He curled up on my lap and didn’t notice the sudden lack of news.
Instead, he hugged me tight and told me of his day.
He hugged me tight, not knowing how much I needed
His small yet strong little arms wrapped up in mine
His wonderful, animated face full of love and excitement.
He talked of future days in school
And I grasped that thread of hope and clung to it;
I clung so tight that I hugged him again and thought not for the
First time—
I am not ready.
I am not prepared to talk to this precious child
About the realities of life.
I am not yet able to formulate the words that
Someday will fray the edges of the safe blanket
He has wrapped around him, that school is safe.
School should be safe, dammit.
It should be a place where children can learn and grow and
Take flight with learning and imagination.
School should be safe.
I am not ready.
So I hugged him back.
14 November 2019
